I am 20 years old. I've been seeing my boyfriend since we were both in high school. We became really serious after graduation, and started having sex last year. The subject of marriage comes up every few months, but he always finds a reason to put off commitment. I understand how that is and I'm willing to wait. But that's not the problem. The problem is that now he's using his "time until commitment" to see other women! He's not even shy about it, and yesterday introduced me to a girl he is seeing besides me! I cried for 6 hours straight. It is so unfair! What should I do?
Signed, Frustrated in Folsom
You may have given yourself too quickly, but that's not a woman's fault. And who am I to talk; I gave myself the first day! But if my boyfriend now wanted to see other women I'd send him away for a month-long tour with instructions not to come back a day before! Because once he found out they were nothing in comparison, and then spent a few weeks with nothing besides, he would be back in no time and prepared to suffer for it. Of course being death gives me an advantage (I could just kill him) but in your case you have familiar, comfortable, and understood going for you. When he's going through the early stages of relating with a strange female and dealing with a woman's necessary trials, he'll remember how sweet and understanding you were and all those trouble-free years together and he'll want that back. It's what we having going for us, we patient girls, and some men only recognize it once it's gone. When they do, we win. Forever.
And you know what, forever is the most important thing a woman has to offer.
In the meantime, go meet some nice guys to occupy your time. You still have that daring too-short skirt and those naughty too-high heels, right? Dig them out, dust them off, and go hunting!